Ì lðvê Jð§h

Ì lðvê Jð§h

Ì lðvê Jð§h

Ì lðvê Jð§h

Ì lðvê Jð§h

Ì lðvê Jð§h

I admit it! Ì lðvê Jð§h!

I. Love. Josh.

Of course, no one in my Youth Group, however, can know that, so shut up, you!

On Friday night, Elise FINALLY (been praying for a year) came to Youth again and got saved! She's a child of God!

She thought Josh was a good choice.

doh!

This morning at church, Josh high-fived me 3 times! Each time my hand relaxed, tingled and felt warm against his soft touch. Even when he was trying to hurt me, it felt so nice.

So why do I feel guilty everytime I lay my eyes on him, dreaming about what could be?

HELP!

Now I finally know it's true
I've fallen in love with you
And even though you love her
And I pretend I don't care
Inside I'm bleeding for you

^^ a verse in my latest song...


Josh is so beautiful and amazing. He glides and smiles, rarely, and usually a smirk, granted, but it's just great. Wow, I've fallen for the Beauty with the inner Beast..............................


What am I gonna do? I can't stop myself, but I can't touch him, can I? We're on opposite ends of the food chain... it doesn't work...

And I get a sneaking suspicion my parents want me to like him, after all, we're at his house almost every 3rd weekend, we've been on 2 holiday's with his family and my parents ask things like "Was Nathan at youth last night? What about JOSH' etc. etc. etc.

What's a girl meant to do when the only thing she can think about is him but the only thing he can think about is another her?

Love Confirmed

Last night was so amazing. We had Youth, as we always do on Friday nights and Andrew spoke about anger, how it can be a good thing, but shouldn't be used to sin or to fuel revenge. It was an amazing teaching, something I didn't need last night, at the moment I'm handling anger quite well, actually, but probably will need some time in the future.

Anyway, Josh went up to the altar. Josh, the angel, the perfect guy, the one I've fallen in love with. Almost all the guys went up, but so did Josh. Everyone who didn't go up (like me) laid hands on them and prayed... I prayed over all of them, but mainly Josh. I felt tingly again and it was really nice. He was crying and everything and it was all I could do to stop myself from going up there, hugging him and telling him it was alright. I can't believe it's that strong.......

Love is new to me. Never felt it before, only lied to myself about it- Josh has always been like an enemy and then I fell in love with him... but for about half a year I lied to myself that I loved another guy at Youth, but in reality I was just hiding from the truth......

I have no idea what to do. I'm always the smart one, getting dux, yada yada. But now, I'm clueless.